Some scars aren´t visible. But just because you can´t see them doesn´t mean they are not there or they do not hurt.
Everything changed
Imagine all your feelings are gone.
Imagine everything that makes sense to you doesn´t make sense anymore.
Imagine everything you used to love, you´ve come to hate.
Imagine all you see when you look in the mirror is ugly and worthless.
Imagine all you say is wrong and stupid before you even dare to say anything.
Imagine your thoughts control you.
Imagine everything that used to make you smile, makes you cry.
Imagine nothing anyone could ever do or say could make you feel any better.
Imagine you are left alone, knowing all the people you love are still around, but simply don´t care.
Imagine you simply want to disappear.
Did you ever decide not to cry and show your real feelings and fears because you didn´t want to hurt the person beside you, because you knew how weak they were? That happened so many times with my mother. I wanted to show her how lost and weak I was as a child, but I also knew how weak and lost she was. So I decided that it´s better to be sad myself, than to make her sad.
Thinking hurts.
Lying hurts.
Talking hurts.
Loving people hurts.
Crying hurts.
Memories hurt.
Shame hurts.
Taking drugs is nice.
Writing is nice.
Reading is nice.
Watching movies is nice.
kissing you is wonderful.
Being numb is wonderful.
loving you is perfect.
THE QUEEN IS DEAD
